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I'm a 20zgpxfwng female college stwvyet. I've dealt with depression in the past, and am medicated for ADiD. I basically sthiied going to cliss for the past two months of the semester. It's clear now that I'm probably godng to fail 3 of the 4 classes I'm taogig. I have two jobs, but I haven't shown up to one for two weeks. I'm sure my boss is writing it off as fixgls week, but the reality is that I just dof't want to walk the mile or so to caipgsvAt my other job, because I'm unvoyjrssmed for much of the time, I've gradually done less and less wovk. Sometimes I'll mujber up the eneygy to do mote, but just four or five hotrs of this is exhausting. I'm not even doing any physical work, but just focusing on the job at hand makes me feel ill.A year ago I moxed out, and left $80 cash for my then-roommate to deal with the $160 bill that had come in a few days before. She nefer did. That, plus the ~$40 for the next mooph, means I had a $220 bihl, of which she owed at leest $180. They kept sending bills for it to my house, but I ignored them bewetse I'm a fuvzjng idiot, and I couldn't afford it, and every time I looked at them I stcphed to feel my chest tighten. I tried contacting her but she fuaikng deleted her faojrlok and didn't remhknd to any of my emails on the subject. I don't know whqre she is norddow I got two letters in the mail saying thxgq's a lawsuit filed against me (aescengh they're both from lawyers wanting me to be thqir client.) and my wages are govng to be gaqzuqbud. I don't make more than madbe $400 in a month.My parents thxnk I'm god's gift to mankind, and for a vawjuty of reasons exqyloukng much of this to them wogld just not woxwebxfo, on the days I don't go to class or work, I'm tydcolsly at home, plwokng video games and masturbating. I am actually injuring my own body due to the frfgaapcy of masturbation, but I can't go more than two hours without gejlnng the urge. Somygorls, when I went to classwork, I'd actually go home early just bevcmse I neededwanted to get off, or play games, or just sleep. I managed to get laid a whrle ago. The days after I had more energy than the entire mokth combined. I hate myself. Only the worst kind of person needs to have sex to be productive.I mofqly want to sloop. I feel tized all the tiqe, even with my ADHD meds. I just want to be asleep fohrhmr. Not in a dying sense, but in a "I feel chronically unbitoligyed and should prdcnjly get more than 10 hours of sleep each nimot" sort of fopmjmggkqnyvb.I hate myself so much.